I thought i had finally found it. I thought nothing could've been more right. I thought you were more than that. I thought it could've been so much like meaning.
I was Wrong
But now i realize, it would never have been. As much as i hope, as much as i dream, as much as I kid myself about it. It's something i have to get past. I have to accept that fact that you would never be like that, not because of anyone, not even because of yourself.
Yet.
I cant blame you, its not your choice either. Somehow i understand, but i cant accept it. I know im being selfish, being naive, beating myself up over seemingly nothing.
But,
You know what? It means the world to me. So we'll go on our own happy little ways now, I won't try to change you. You wouldn't listen anyways.In the end, its all up to you actually.
Life Goes On.
Cheers
played at
11:53 PM
Make a Stand
Friday, August 29, 2008
Yay! holidays are here! xD Went to the RSAF open house today, just felt like posting these up. Hp ran out of battery halfway >< what a waste.
played at
9:06 PM
Make a Stand
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Finally had some quality sleep! Took the entire afternoon off to sleep off all those late nights spent making up for the two weeks without work. Economics prelims paper 2 coming tomorrow afternoon, still left with 3 chapters...Better speed up my revision.
Today was phototaking, our enthusiasm was practically overflowing xD Well, thats 4/3 for you, United and standing strong, so proud of my class. Rewinding time and given a choice, i would re-enter this school just so i can end up in this class again. Pressures coming in with all the examnations drawing near but knowing the class, we will pull through and grow even stronger.
3 more months. Fight to the end~
played at
10:22 PM
Make a Stand
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Feeling Blue, Well im trying to forget the feeling that i miss you, Feeling Green, When the jealousy sweels and it wont go away and dreams, Feeling Yellow, Im confused inside a little hazy but mellow.
When i feel your eyes on me, Feeling fine, its sublime, When that smile of yours creeps into my mind.
Nobody told me it feels so good, Nobody said you would be so beautiful, Nobody warned me about your smile, You're the light, You're the light, When i close my eyes, Im colourblind.
Feeling Red, When you spend all your time with your friends and not me instead, Feeling Black, When i think about all of the things that i feel i lack, Feeling Jaded, When its not gone right, all the colours are faded.
I just love the lyrics on this song.
played at
7:14 PM
Make a Stand
Friday, August 15, 2008
Pretty horrible English oral today. Why cant it just be about food instead? T.T
She's gone away, and still they stay together. People call me crazy, crazy.
My thoughts progress, I think about her forever. My mind tells me maybe, maybe.
I wish I could drive away to the sunset back to the day that we first met. Only believe the things I wrote. I'll put it in a note, yeah. Cross my t's and dot my i's. Better say hello, cause you cant say goodbye.
I'll write "sincerely yours" and sign my name. P.S. I love you. Forever and today.
'To live is to learn'. How often we hear that phrase, yet how often do we sit down and give it some thought it deserves?
Knowledge is the basis of life. Why? For one, we cant take anything down with us when we die. Money gets passed on and eventually returns to the economy. Memories of you get lost along the ages. What stays and gets passed on are only the knowledge you have inherited and given to the world along the course of your life.
We often wonder about the meaning of life, why are we living here? Whats the ultimate purpose of us being able to live, think, breathe and eventually die? Well, life itself is an experience to say the least. At the end of the day its not about succeeding in life, living in luxury, having a stable job, having children...We live to learn, to gain wisdom, and finally, to return that wisdom to the world which we came out from.
We push aside that question too often with excuses like 'I want to get rich' or 'I have to ace this upcoming test, that question can wait'. To finally find a purpose in life, i think its time to answer it.
played at
7:38 PM
Make a Stand
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Beginning to be able to get it out of my thoughts. Was kinda chatty today to keep up my mood. I've come to realize that to fight a battle, one must never look back. Be it in a war or in an examination hall, you must always look forward. To look back would be to see your fallen comrades, to mourn the loss of your loved ones, or simply to lose yourself in worry over a badly done paper.
I have to thank my friends for helping me get through this difficult period with their support, true friends are always there for each other, I'll have you guys know that i'll always be there for you whenever you may need me.
played at
11:23 PM
Make a Stand
Monday, August 11, 2008
Prelim 1 is over, guess i should be kinda excited over my grades, or worried about the next prelim...but you know what, thats soo far from my mind now.
Hate to start this blog negatively, so lets talk about something else instead. Been thinking about the past alot lately, nostalgia and all. Doesn't everyone wish they could turn back time once in a while? I mean, life is full of regrets, like the time when i gave up on swimming cause i just didnt like it in primary 5. Or the time when i left my friend for another, even when he had always stood by me.
Sometimes i simply want to go back in time, correct my errors, set things right, or simply just to relive the moments. I wish i could go back a year ago, notice you, be there with you.
Time and tide wait for no man. The gravity of this phrase really hits me in a moment like this. In a flash, what seemed to be yesterday was 8 months ago. What seemed to be last week was two years ago. I could still remember every single detail of the times where I had fun, where i was sad, where i thought i could've done better. Thing is, they're never going to come back for me-or anyone to change. Sometimes we just have tolive with what fate deals us.
Was scrolling through some old photos and new ones stored on my computer, really admiring how carefree i was last time. I never really did understand many things, hardwork, dtermination, friendship, sorrow. And love.
I used to spend my times, reading, playing, drawing..being myself simply. But as i grow up i realise these things are starting to become more and more like luxuries. They simply take up too much time. Choices have to be made and these choices come up more an more often as i grow up. Life suddenly becomes more important as you grow up, its no longer about now, its about the future, its no longer about yourself, its about others. A painful way have i learnt that throughout my years. Wish i had learnt it earlier.
But even as everyone gets these feelings, there is painfully little we can do about it. So at the end of the day, its all about enjoying the moment more. Who knows, two years later i may be envying myself, four years down the road i may be a completely different person...eight? ten? twenty years? I may have even forgotten about how i was like as a boy. People think too much about what they want to do, but have you ever thought, if we're sacrificing our current happiness for the future, why are we feeling so bad now?
Moral of the story, stop listening to what others say about thinking about the future. Sure, you have to make plans, sometimes compromise your time now for it, but at the end of the day, what really matters is the present. Forget about the future, at least you can be happy NOW.
Decided to end this post with some of the pictures i was looking through.
2/3 class outing 2 years ago. We all miss you pecky.
2/3 class outing 2 years ago. We all miss you pecky.
My very own gundam! xD had to dig out the time for this one.
